One of the best places to impress possible clients is at the ceremonies
you perform. If you are a marriage celebrant you will learn, in preparing the
legal documents, not only the clients’ names but also those of their parents.
But in all ceremonies, it is more than likely that other persons, apart from
your clients, will be involved in the ceremony. Make an effort to learn the
names before you get to the ceremony and try to make a point of seeing and
speaking to these people. Don’t think of the time before or after the ceremony
as wasted time. Rather use this time to get to know as many people as you can
by speaking to them.
To make your contact with people effective, make the conversation less
a few minutes of pretending to listen, and genuinely listen. If you don’t
understand what the conversation is about, ask. If you hold a conversation with
someone long enough, you will probably arrive at a subject in which both of you
can find interest.
Don’t allow you client, or whoever is looking after you, to introduce
you to a group of people with, ‘This is John, this is Mary, this is..’. It is
unlikely that you will remember any of them, and worse, you will be too
backward in asking the names of the people individually, and thus lose a
valuable time in finding out where each of these people fit.
Instead, suggest that you will introduce yourself - and do it. Spend
enough time with each person to find out their name, their connection to the
client and something of interest about the person concerned. Ask for their
business card if you find someone whose services you might use, or whom you
want to contact for further information, and offer yours if he asks for it.
Carry the cards in a neat little box or wallet that you can carry easily any
place you go.
As far as maintaining conversation is concerned, ask questions in a way
which will give the person an opportunity to give you a reply of a few
sentences instead of just a ‘yes’ or ‘no’. Whether speaking or listening, don’t
ask for clarifications of details which are not important for the overall
picture. Look for the message and not the detours.
We are becoming an ageing population so recognise this when talking to
groups of people. Make an effort to speak clearly and loudly if you know from
experience that people are finding you difficult to understand. Similarly, if
you’re having difficulty in hearing, make it a bit of a joke that every since
you turned forty or fifty or whatever, your hearing isn’t what it used to be.
Some people do tend to speak very softly, especially in a social
situation, and unless you encourage them to speak up, the conversation can keep
you uncomfortable and fearful that you’re about to be asked a question and you
have absolutely no idea what reply to make. Inaudibility, like bad breath, is a
subject that nobody wants to raise, but which will make for much happier
interaction when it is raised.
Never forget, that celebrancy is a people thing. Everyone needs people,
and in particular, celebrants whose business is people.
Excerpt from 'How to be a Profitable Celebrant'
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