On
the other hand there are couples who love each other enough to set up a home
together, but find they just can’t get around to make their commitment a legal
one. They fall. into a state universally known as “procrastination”. Because it
takes some effort to actually get married they choose to do nothing at all.
To
simply do it by easy stages these couples go through the Commitment Ceremony to
tell each other that marriage is definitely on their agenda - just in case one
of them loses heart and becomes restless.
There
are also couples who start living together because they may be too young to get
married, or they may feel that they need to get to know each other better
before making their commitment a legal one. They may continue to go on like
this for years, effectively stopping their partner from looking elsewhere.
As
time goes by one may become quite eager to get married and start a family. The
other one may continuously find reasons why the marriage should be postponed
for just a little longer.
This
is often a subtle hint that the partner is not ready for a life time
commitment; and, quite often, will never be ready in this particular
relationship. Suggesting a commitment ceremony to such a reluctant partner may
force an honest examination of his or her feelings. The result may be a
decision to break up. In the long run
this may be the kindest and wisest thing to do, especially if partners
are no longer young and can’t afford five or six years of marking time.
A
Commitment is celebrated in the same spirit as the Renewal of Vows. Because it
is one of the newest additions to the ceremonies of love, the couple are free
to choose a ceremony and setting, its method of celebration, that truly reflects
their own feelings and aspirations.
Based on my book
CELEBRATING LOVE'S SPECIAL MOMENTS
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